Prioritize! Don't pay the mortgage on a house you do not have title to. Your husband's family will pay it to protect the asset. Move back into the family home if you can...the children have rights to it. Is this lack of funding being done to 'punish' you for your actions? Yikes! The next volume of your memoir is going to have some scathing commentary to make on this time period! :)
My advice would be to go to a family lawyer (ask friends for a referral) and ask them to work pro bono until this is sorted out. There should be a a way to garnish his wages, and get into his bank account. In the meantime, document all your expenses and try to keep track of your lost income, etc. could you give up the flat and move back into the house while he’s not there to save some $
What a distressing position to be in, and I would say that given that the sole responsibility for the boys has fallen on you, then part of that responsibility is to garner their necessary share of the family income, and yours also as carer. This is basic and perhaps you have a solicitor friend who could start to make this happen for you. Not anyone's first choice. Good luck and and I hope you're finding some peace with the boys this season, as difficult as other things are. I hope things look better soon.
Leah - I've been reading your posts with fascination, horror, sympathy, and fascination again. As always, the writing is fantastic: raw, honest, real. I'd tell you to "keep notes," but you're already doing that. I hope to see you again soon. Keep writing.
Currently I am being bothered by the incessant yapping of the tiny dog in residence in the apartment next door. Like you I am having to rent for a while, even though I have a home waiting for my return. Your predicament is far worse (interesting how we humans tend to rank our dilemmata) and having three sons of my own I ache for your boys. Re: Anger- I would be in a furious state if I couldn't get answers. Would your profile/reputation be damaged it you took your story to the wider press? The way you are being treated seems criminal. Perhaps some systems need shaking. I think I'll go bang on my neighbour's door. I wish you peace Ms.McL.
I can well imagine your frustration, anger and sadness. We feel it too. While your husband is not able to think clearly at the moment, I’m sure he wouldn’t want his boys to struggle. Gaining access to family funds to live on is essential. Perhaps take a bit of the help friends and family are offering and engage a lawyer? Not your first choice for sure, but it sounds as though the time has come.
Prioritize! Don't pay the mortgage on a house you do not have title to. Your husband's family will pay it to protect the asset. Move back into the family home if you can...the children have rights to it. Is this lack of funding being done to 'punish' you for your actions? Yikes! The next volume of your memoir is going to have some scathing commentary to make on this time period! :)
My advice would be to go to a family lawyer (ask friends for a referral) and ask them to work pro bono until this is sorted out. There should be a a way to garnish his wages, and get into his bank account. In the meantime, document all your expenses and try to keep track of your lost income, etc. could you give up the flat and move back into the house while he’s not there to save some $
What a distressing position to be in, and I would say that given that the sole responsibility for the boys has fallen on you, then part of that responsibility is to garner their necessary share of the family income, and yours also as carer. This is basic and perhaps you have a solicitor friend who could start to make this happen for you. Not anyone's first choice. Good luck and and I hope you're finding some peace with the boys this season, as difficult as other things are. I hope things look better soon.
Leah - I've been reading your posts with fascination, horror, sympathy, and fascination again. As always, the writing is fantastic: raw, honest, real. I'd tell you to "keep notes," but you're already doing that. I hope to see you again soon. Keep writing.
Currently I am being bothered by the incessant yapping of the tiny dog in residence in the apartment next door. Like you I am having to rent for a while, even though I have a home waiting for my return. Your predicament is far worse (interesting how we humans tend to rank our dilemmata) and having three sons of my own I ache for your boys. Re: Anger- I would be in a furious state if I couldn't get answers. Would your profile/reputation be damaged it you took your story to the wider press? The way you are being treated seems criminal. Perhaps some systems need shaking. I think I'll go bang on my neighbour's door. I wish you peace Ms.McL.
I can well imagine your frustration, anger and sadness. We feel it too. While your husband is not able to think clearly at the moment, I’m sure he wouldn’t want his boys to struggle. Gaining access to family funds to live on is essential. Perhaps take a bit of the help friends and family are offering and engage a lawyer? Not your first choice for sure, but it sounds as though the time has come.
And yes, here’s to a better 2023 for us all🙏
I am sorry to hear about your situation. I hope 2023 brings better news for you & your family.
Sending warm thoughts and best wishes for 2023 from Canada’s west coast 🤗
-Old Globe follower
Hopefully at least the financial side will be sorted out soon🙏
BTW, I gave my sister a subscription to Juvenescence and she’s thrilled! Another Toronto gal who misses you from the Globe❤️